24 JANUARY 2009. the end of our story.
i know its pretty long since that day. its been 27 days but i still cant get over it. Maybe things are better now in the sense that im not crying my eyes out every single time. maybe occassional tears but im stronger than i used to be. its really funny how things got out of hand like that. i guess this will be my last post on this blog. this blog filled with our wonderful memories. somehow, he will always be that important person. he will always have a place in my heart. i didnt expect to be feeling it so badly after so many days. i guess he has gotten over it and it pains me to know so. somehow there is this nigging feeling that maybe it was just a game to him but then again, i believed in him and i still do. im sure it was as important to him. but i dont know why. that feeling just wont go away. i really miss him. i really do. i keep hoping that maybe someday he will come back but i know that is impossible. im trying to stop myself from hoping. its just so difficult. things can just change overnight and it really scares me. so fast.. i guess once i take my things back, i would be officially be out of his life. im afraid that he will forget me.. if he could get over it so fast, does it mean he can forget me as well? i just hope thats not true.. i dont know. for now, i have to pick myself up because this entire year started off on the wrong foot and i feel like my life is entirely pathetic. im hoping that things will pick up. and i want to do well as well. for him.. i love you ching, now and always.
goodbye.
i know its pretty long since that day. its been 27 days but i still cant get over it. Maybe things are better now in the sense that im not crying my eyes out every single time. maybe occassional tears but im stronger than i used to be. its really funny how things got out of hand like that. i guess this will be my last post on this blog. this blog filled with our wonderful memories. somehow, he will always be that important person. he will always have a place in my heart. i didnt expect to be feeling it so badly after so many days. i guess he has gotten over it and it pains me to know so. somehow there is this nigging feeling that maybe it was just a game to him but then again, i believed in him and i still do. im sure it was as important to him. but i dont know why. that feeling just wont go away. i really miss him. i really do. i keep hoping that maybe someday he will come back but i know that is impossible. im trying to stop myself from hoping. its just so difficult. things can just change overnight and it really scares me. so fast.. i guess once i take my things back, i would be officially be out of his life. im afraid that he will forget me.. if he could get over it so fast, does it mean he can forget me as well? i just hope thats not true.. i dont know. for now, i have to pick myself up because this entire year started off on the wrong foot and i feel like my life is entirely pathetic. im hoping that things will pick up. and i want to do well as well. for him.. i love you ching, now and always.
goodbye.
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